This post originally appeared on Substack in August of 2023.

Over the weekend, we took a short but sweet road trip down to Athens, GA for an admissions tour and college visit for my middle daughter, Mae. She’s a senior and so the college discussions and decisions are coming fast and furiously. Her younger sister, Kate, is only a few years behind her so she benefitted from the trip too!

Having launched their older brother, Thomas, a little over a year ago, these questions of where they will attend college, what they will study, and how to choose a vocation are never far from our family conversations.

With our frequent transitions and relocations, I personally get a regular opportunity to figure out how I’ll spend my time professionally. Beyond our children, Ryan and I frequently talk about our joint plans for post-military life.

I think society is constantly sending mixed messages about what is most important. As we parent our kids through the passage to adulthood and all that entails as well as continue living as professional adults ourselves, I wanted to take a moment to examine the idea of “the best mix.”

• Money is an obvious and vital factor. You’ve got to eat and have a place to live. One cannot work for free. A certain amount of money makes life more comfortable and removes a layer of stress. While money has never been a main target of what we are aiming for, we aren’t allergic to it altogether. (The larger takeaway is to build a life without debt and live below your means so that you aren’t always chasing bigger and better, but find contentment in what you have.)
• Impact matters to some as well. As humans, I think we all desire to have a greater purpose in our work. I know that Ryan as a minister and I as a teacher, both feel a tug for our work to make a difference in the lives of those we serve. It’s actually probably a lot more than simply a “tug.” I think the impact is very important and what gets us up in the mornings as well as keeps us engaged long-term in the work we feel called to do.
• Fun is the last category and arguably the most overlooked when it comes to career. I mean, they don’t call it “going to fun,” they call it “going to work.” Work is meant to be challenging and laborious. However, I think we underestimate joy and life satisfaction in how we choose to spend our days. What parts of my day are fun? And what makes it so?

As we continue to engage our own kids and help them wrestle with the ideals in which a “best mix” can intersect, I’ll leave you with a line from one of my favorite liturgies* I pray over our kids constantly:Text within this block will maintain its original spacing when published

“Open, O Lord, as you will, 
the paths of my life in the days yet to come. 
Use my studies to further shape my vision 
of what my place and call in this world might be. 
Begin to show me where 
my own deep gladness 
and the world’s deep need might meet.”

*This liturgy is shared in its entirety with permission by Douglass McKelvey here.

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I know that for our kids, this crosspoint of where their own deep gladness and the world’s need meet will ultimately be theirs to discover. If you are a parent, you, too, know that this isn’t ours to figure out with them or for them. However, if you are personally in a place where you are trying to discern your best use of time and influence, of earning money, having an impact, and having fun… I’ll share something that has been incredibly helpful to me.

About a year ago, I took one of the most clarifying assessments as it relates to professional clarity. I love the Myers-Briggs, Strengths Finder, and Enneagram, so when I found the Get Clear Assessment, it was a no-brainer.

With all of our moving and my constant ebb and flow of employment, having this blueprint has helped me make good decisions about what does and doesn’t fit me professionally as opportunities come and go.

It centers around the three main ideas of talent, passion, and mission. Below are some of my results I’ve been pondering and implementing for nearly a year now.

My top three talents are Execution, Communication, and Organization.

EXECUTION

You’re highly productive and you’re good at checking things off your to-do list. You pay attention to the work that’s assigned to you and take your responsibilities seriously. You’re good at setting goals, keeping track of progress and taking initiative to improve your work. Always ready to take the first step, you’re action-oriented, practical, and focused. You look at the end result of a project or task and think about what steps you need to take to get it done on schedule.

COMMUNICATION

You’re gifted at sharing thoughts, feelings and information through speaking or writing. You’re known for your ability to tell a compelling story as well as your ability to express ideas clearly. You’re good at understanding people, identifying messages others are trying to convey, being understood, connecting with others and getting your point across. Articulating your thoughts and sharing them with those around you comes very naturally for you.

ORGANIZATION

You’re good at creating order out of chaos and inventing or improving systems. Coming up with new and better processes is easy and you enjoy managing all the variables in a complex situation. You’re able to grasp the big picture of a project, task or idea and then work backward to see how all the parts come together. You operate well with rules, routine and clear expectations. Spending a Saturday organizing a messy closet would be a piece of cake for you.

My top three passions are Finishing, Teaching, and Advocating.

FINISHING

You experience tremendous satisfaction when you or your team bring a project or task over the finish line. You love accuracy and attention to detail. You always make sure that all the boxes are checked before you give your stamp of approval on a project or task. You’re disciplined and careful in the work you do. You take a lot of pride in practicing excellence in the ordinary and following through with the tasks that have been assigned to you or your team.

TEACHING

You come alive when you’re sharing knowledge, opening up people’s minds to new ideas, and helping them learn new skills. You lose track of time when you’re thinking of new ways to communicate what you know to others and inspire them to change. You enjoy teaching about something and seeing people move from point A to point B as they improve. You appreciate the mastery of a subject and recognize the important difference it can make in the lives of others.

ADVOCATING

You have a deep desire to use your voice to speak on behalf of a certain cause or group of people. You’ve got a crusader mentality. You’re persuasive, articulate, and passionate about defending the rights of the vulnerable or raising awareness about an important issue. You want to protect the weak and challenge injustice. You long to be part of a movement that creates meaningful change—whether that be for one person, a community, or even society in general.

My top mission is Efficiency.

EFFICIENCY

You feel significance when you’re creating and maintaining efficient systems and results. Order gives you energy while disorder drains you. You look for order and efficiency as a sign of quality. When observing disorder and dysfunction in systems or policies, you instinctively see or wonder about the source of the problem and the solution. You look for ways to establish new and better procedures that will result in a better overall system or an end product.

This all checks out as I have built out my current schedule of work and service that reflects these ideals. Some of this happened naturally and organically and some of it happened as a result of knowing and implementing this information.

How do you feel about the idea of a “best mix?” Do you know what your talents, passions, and mission are?